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What Your Condom Choice Says About You

What Your Condom Choice Says About You

While all men are created equal (apparently)…not all condoms are! I realize that in the heat of ‘the moment’ there’s really no time to judge your partner on what they pull out of their purse, wallet, bedside table or back pocket (keener much?). And while you may not be able to fully recall what that plastic wrapper looked like…I can assure you the feeling you’ll never forget! So let’s dive right into it shall we, what does your condom choice say about you?


I don’t care what the adverts say, this is a yeast infection just waiting to happen ladies! If you are spending actual money on flavoured condoms you either have a great sense of humour or picked them up while grocery shopping on an empty stomach. So what does this condom choice say about you…you’re hungry. Full stop.


…for who’s pleasure? If ribbed condoms are your cup of tea, good on yah mate! You’re the type of person who loves adventure and doesn’t mind venturing out of their comfort zone (within reason). Ribbed condoms add a little *umph* to the bedroom, giving that extra bit of stimulation both of you may be looking for.

Fancy packaging

As a sucker (pun intended) for good marketing, I applaud companies like ONE who made condom packaging beautiful. At the same time however, if you’re buying these condoms…how much sex are you actually having? They ain’t cheap! You’re the type of person who enjoys the finer things in life, perhaps shops at Waitrose and M&S even though you live next to an Aldi.


No pain no gain, who’s with me!? You my friend are always up for a challenge. I think that’s a given if you or your partner goes lub-less. You’re an all-or-nothing type of person, not afraid to put all your eggs in one basket and roll the dice. Your honesty pervades everything you do and people know what they see is what they get.

The free ones from Freshers Week

You’re definitely a quantity over quality type of person if you’re seen putting one of these bad boys to good use. You’re natural habitat is the yellow sticker section at Tesco, but truth be told that premade lasagna is just as good the day it’s due to expire than when it was put on the shelf. Same, same, amiright?! A condom choice like this also come with a lack of preparedness, but there’s nothing wrong with the heat of the moment! You do you!

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what condom you’re using – you’re already making the NHS…and your mother proud by putting one on in the first place!

Rejig your love life.

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